A lesson in how to cope with disappointment

I recently decided to leave my collar at home, find a cathedral and spend a couple of days praying, reading, and generally recharging my batteries. I chose Chelmsford - not too far away, and with the railway station, Cathedral and pleasant riverside walks all near each other.

Arriving after lunch I made my way to the Cathedral. Deliberately dressed to look like an ordinary visitor rather than a vicar, I walked through the door – and straight into a graduation ceremony. I clearly wasn’t supposed to be there. So I retreated back through the door, and decided to go for a walk instead.

A young woman stopped me: “Is it OK to go inside?” We started chatting. Tears welled up as she explained that she would have graduating herself had treatment for a brain tumour discovered during her studies not destroyed her ability to learn. She asked what I was doing there – and my cover was blown. I ended up promising to pray for her. She thanked me and left, warning that if I saw her again an hour from then, she wouldn’t recognise me.

By the following morning the Cathedral staff, too, had worked out who I was. After the morning Communion service I was taken to a coffee shop. There I told the Precentor about the young woman I’d met whose dreams had been so cruelly shattered, and yet who hadn’t given up on life – she was working in a garden centre, and volunteering for a cancer charity. Despite her disappointment, no self-pity or brooding about what might have been for her. She had been there that day because she was genuinely glad for her friends, and wanted to wish them well.

“Wow! What an amazing young woman!” he said.

Amen to that.

Brian